i am sure at some point in my life, i woke up in the morning feeling refreshed, rested and ready to take on the day. i do not, however, remember any such day. i am not a morning person and doubt i ever will be. but looking back on the many recent years of my life, i wake up most days feeling like total crap. i usually sleep until carter (or holden, although it's almost always carter) wakes up. as he walks into my room to announce "it's 7," as he does every day, i typically just want to cry.
as i pry open my eyes, and often before i am even able to do that, i feel the headache. UGH, again?!? my face is often so puffy i am able to see my cheeks out of my peripheral vision and my face throbs. clearly, there is a problem here. unfortunately, it has been going on for so long that it has just become part of my life--suck it up and gimp through the day, always just managing instead of performing at my best. i get "sick" often--mostly cold and sinus issues, but they drag me down even farther. my mother-in-law always seemed to have similar issues and finally found out she had polyps in her sinuses and a crooked nose to blame and had surgery (today) to correct it. motivated by this, and her encouragement, i realized this has to stop.
then came the next issue, which is scheduling any type of appointment for myself. this is near impossible since ryan rarely has his schedule for more than a week at a time and it changes from day-to-day. my most recent dentist appointment had to be rescheduled 3 times, and at that point it starts to become a bit embarrassing. finally, i was able to schedule (and keep!!) an appointment for a sinus CT today. my family doctor called with a report that it indeed showed some thickening of the walls from chronic infection. i have an appointment with an ENT doctor next friday to find out what needs to be done about it. i am pretty much scared to death of that surgery, but something has GOT to give here. REALLY hoping they have an answer for me!